Everybody who works very closely with me knows that when I say that it means " WTF are you thinking?!" I reserve the sacred remark for situations of dire stupidity and dumbassedness, kinda like John Boy and Billy's Stupid Crook News. We sit around the table at lunch or breakfast and talk about stuff and generally appreciate how good life is in spite of the aches and pains and dramas. A second degree separation from the powers that be puts me in a place that I've not been in quite some time...I don't have to answer the phone or wonder about who's the Alpha Male.


*you thought i'd slam him, didn't ya?*

Over time my list has included Terri Schiavo's harem and whatever guy said "Let's go kick some ass." I hate Hitler and Al-whathisname and all the rest of the bad guys. I love my dogs, 'cuz they're my babies and they lick my tears away when I'm sad. The cats are o.k.a.y but high maintenance. That doesn't exactly fit into my current fantasy.


He would hold me when I'm sad until it passes.
*
Either a mighty fine cook or able to buy some good food. Footnote: America is fat because eating healthy is expensive.
*
Buy me a candle. Nothing says romance like a slow burn.
*
Loves dogs.

* * * * *

My life has been filled with so many little two or three act plays..ones that begin here and wander there until the next story begins. Co-workers have come and gone and stayed until that's a story unto itself. There's an interesting sort of fellow there who might get written in at a later time.

Family is front and center right now. BG and BF are doing their part and I'm glad to be on a team again. Mom still has the cast so I reckon we'll serve her Mother's Day dinner to her recliner ;) My brothers and I communicate talk frequently. That's a good thread to follow. My cousin's hubby recently was wounded badly in Iraq. His Daddy's remarks were as follows: "I'd like to march right up to Washington and tell 'em ALL to go to hell." It's sooo not about them. This too shall pass, so sayeth Mr. Billy the furniture store guy from church. He and wifey are part of the Sunday School class that care so well for each other. That's not peculiarly Methodist, mind you. More small-groupish, if you will. Mom and Daddy had food for two weeks and we enjoyed it too. Those people? Nah, I'd never hate them.

*Breaking News*
I have declared war on dust around this old house. That's a mighty risky proposition in an 85 year old masterpiece but,hey. I couldn't breathe. All of the carpet is gone and I'm taking applications for slave boys to finish the floors. We'll deal later with the fact that I live smack in the middle of a farm where there's freaking dirt flyin' everywhere.

It's doing the spring thunderstorm thing around here. Four years ago this week I missed gettin' hit by the big one that tore the 'Burg up one side and down the other. That was when I wrote the letter by candlelight. A female voice answered the phone and I hung up quickly and began to scribble these words:

"Hey chief." "I was so scared that I would die tonight and never have the chance to tell you." He was polite and obviously didn't trust me..thought I was some kind of golddigger appealing to his stupid male side. I've read Mars and Venus, TYVM.

* It's raining like a mofo! *

It all started with breakfast at work. What better way to start the day than with a woman who adores you???? "Cheap date," he said. Uh huh. That was my life's story. He was so damned cute I couldn't resist one more try with the bad boy. SJ says that little men have this thing they do where they have to go all ape shit and cocky because somebody stands taller than them. The Little Man Syndrome.

After the storm, my friends Rae and K let me stay in thier house while they were out of town. I began to heal that week, from the pain of living in a marriage with an addict. The entire time that we were married and raising BabyGirl I could feel the weight of "the family" being the only thing that kept him from self-destruction. It was damn heavy, and I wanted more.

Next dispatch forthcoming.

^j^